“Never, ever, ever, under any circumstances, say ‘I’ll be right back.’” – Randy Meeks, SCREAM
Lindsay should have learned this rule the first time she watched SCREAM. She should have known better than to let those words escape her lips . . . but she did.
Perhaps we should start from the beginning.
Things were going just fine for Lindsay this morning. She had coffee. She had her laptop fired up and her Twitter feed was buzzing like the mess of under-caffeination it usually is prior to six a.m. She was even trying on Halloween garb, and taking some time in a gloriously silent house to put the finishing touches on the plans for her kids costume party.
That’s when she felt it. The sensation that she was no longer alone with her coffee mug and glowing screen. Someone was in the house with Lindsay, and it most definitely wasn’t her sleeping children or her husband. It was something dark.
This is where our dear Scream Queen ignored all of the rules of the horror genre and made her fatal error. She promptly turned to her dog and proclaimed: “I’ll be right back”.
Only Lindsay didn’t come back. Because as we’ve been told, she ended up on the cold, tile floor of her bathroom, partially-clad in a Halloween costume, with a slit throat. Whodunit? Well, that’s up for you all to figure out!